Sexual Ask

I have about 3 or 4 questions here…they can probably be answered in one paragraph…I would appreciate it if someone knowledgeable could take the time to reassure me/explain to me about this issue. By the way, the most important question is the last one, if you wish to skip (which I don’t recommend) the bulk of the story.

My Stats: 5” erection (self-measured correctly from the abs) of which I’m proud

I am a 20 year old virgin who worries about having sex because of the following issue:

2 years ago I accidentally altered the shape of my penis head during masturbation, somehow transforming its look from that of a very round shape, to that of a lopsided one.

What’s worse, for 2 years my head would not get hard during morning wood and would not get hard during standing masturbation.

I wound up going to world-class urologists who administered meds to give me an erection to check for venis leak.

1st question: Is the erection one gets from these meds one’s maximum erection?

The doctors paid no attention to me and made me feel really insecure. I asked one of them this question and he said “no, there are different levels of arousal and different erections for each stage.”

K, so anyway, I’ve gone to about 5 urologists who have said I’m totally fine but most of whom have only seen me in my flaccid state. Some have never heard of this “soft head issue” which makes me believe that it has to do with erectile dysfunction than damage done to the penis.

But to the point: Yesterday I was masturbating (sitting down for once) and I somehow got my penis head HUGE and hard for the first time in as long as I can remember.

2nd question: how is this? Why am I unable to achieve a hard head while standing up but why can achieve one sitting down? Does it have to do with blood flow/ erectile dysfunction?

Urologists and even my father have told me that I just need to find a girl and have sex and that, when I am stimulated inside a girl and by a girl, I will achieve an erection that I cannot on my own. Is this true?

THE LAST QUESTION:

In the morning, in the shower, when standing or lying down, I cannot get the head of my penis very hard. While I can achieve an erection, that is, while I can get my penis up, the head stays soft and kind of small. I thought some permanent damage had been done, to which these symptoms were testament. But seeing as how I can achieve a very hard penis head when sitting down (even though I can’t always maintain it) this shows that I did no serious damage to my head, correct?

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